In The Family Of Things

My husband grew these on the allotment....bunches and bunches of them - we eat them every day for  dessert at lunch time.

The Exe Estuary at Lympstone where we walked this afternoon in 18 degrees warmth.

A snippet of blue sky.... 

At Stonehaven, Scotland, in 25 degrees - very end of September.

This morning I drive deep into Devon, to a very old farmhouse, to continue my journey of unravelling, healing, forgiving all the decisions I made in my past - like I can't trust anyone to look after me -  with the help of a wise and gentle loving woman skilled in the ways of Family Constellation work....

This time I stand in the shoes of my father, my mother, and honour Africa -  the mighty place, the role that it played in their lives, their hearts....and mine..... let go of the guilt and the loss... let in the huge gratitude I feel for them and the country of my birth.....

Which somehow makes me realise how precious this time is now.... to treasure these days, these months with my husband just the way he is now...... not how he will be....however that is. So after  our egg mayo /salad/grapes lunch I say,

 It's such a beautiful day, let's go to the sea and have an ice cream.

 In the end, because we have a visitor coming later, we go to the river and pick blackberries from the high hedgerows instead. I say

  Let's not talk too much.....

 just for a little while I don't want to explain each time who everyone is in our life. So we hold hands and marvel at the skeins of Canada geese dipping and swerving in formation over the silver mud estuary, calling to each other - 

......harsh and exciting ........over and over

announcing their place

in the family of things.

(adapted from Mary Oliver's 'Wild Geese'.)