21st June - the Solstice.
The longest day.
The hottest night.
The white of summer.
Even though I still have a lot to do as I'm going away for the weekend, this evening the sun is like a
demanding magnet. I sit for a long time with my feet up on one of the green plastic garden chairs and watch the pigeons and the magpies squabbling over the bird seed.
And I let the leaving of the garden sink into my skin along with the prickle of the sun.
Later I wash up my supper dishes still wearing my sunglasses and try and imagine myself in another garden, in another kitchen and wonder how I will ever make it my home. This is still my home but it's echoey empty without Robin. So some magnet is pulling me towards a just-me home and repelling me at the same time. Sometimes exciting..... but then I want to creep back into the safety of how it was....but how it can never be again. Stressful and tiring and and rooted in grieving.
I'm taking a short blogging break but will be back soon.
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