... red cherries to celebrate.

Bills - road tax, car insurance, Marks and Spencer's, buildings insurance, TV licence. I sit at the kitchen table and pay them -  all online now. Don't know why it takes me so long.

I start clearing and sorting the cabinet drawers and bookshelves in the dining room....covering the table with piles of paper.

I clear and sort the old bags of compost, rotting leaves, broken pots, dead plants, and redundant  plastic boxes at the end of the garden. Dirt under my nails.

I water the thirsty garden - the earth cracking -  think about what shall I take with me....what shall I leave behind? 

I fill the car with fuel, buy wonky asparagus and a globe artichoke at Morrisons, and boxes of  honey mangoes at the Indian store and a box of red cherries at the Turkish shop.

I chargrill the asparagus,  boil the artichoke, and make a mustardy, garlicky, peppery hot dressing to dip the tips and leaves into and to smear over the poached eggs. In memory of the wonky bounty of Robin's  allotment. 

Afterwards  I peel a sticky sweet perfumed mango in memory of my mother.

And all the time I'm waiting for news. When it comes it lifts my heart with hope.

And I eat a handful of red cherries to celebrate.