25th January 2013
I wanted someone else’s life today. Trying to sort out getting dial -up off our home phone, feeling defeated by the mess and clutter in all the rooms of the house - I found a plastic bag with 3 foodie presents in it for my husband that I forgot to wrap up for him at Christmas - it felt like wading through treacle with snow shoes on.
Imagine being able to write a poem every night that only takes you 15 minutes and is beautiful and moving. And the doing of it transfoms how you live your days. Noticing the moments of your life instead of rushing through it, and holding it at bay at the same time - a speeding train with the brakes on.
This is that amazing woman - Samantha Reynolds - her poetry is at bentily.com
After a long cup of mint tea in a cafe this afternoon with a woman whose husband is only a year older than mine, and who has vascular dementia, and can never be left alone, I felt so grateful for the life I have, ashamed of my complaining....
Tonight I sit next to my husband in the dark of the cinema. I’m wearing my ‘fat’ jeans as my stomach bloated up this afternoon like a round stretched drum - and I don’t know why. I cry at the end of the film - ‘Quartet - ’ all that loss and sadness leaking out through the humour and the hope.
I don’t want to be young again. But I do want to notice and savour the precious moments.
Before it’s too late. This day gone already - another fallen bronze leaf...
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