Doing It All On Your Own

In the absence of kingfishers on the pond in the park I take photos of ducks instead.....busy preening or snoozing.

 Even with all the amazing support I have I'm beginning to get the hang of ''doing it all on your own''.....the money.....the house...the car.... the garden.....the diary....the health. And hoovering the stairs .....putting the rubbish out......doing the washing up. And learning how to put on someone else's socks for them. Like every carer and single parent in the country.

But I forgot it includes going out to buy the Indian take away yourself. I thought about getting it delivered but then it wouldn't be something to do together to help pass the hours before supper.

On the way, driving through heavy traffic and headlights in the rain Robin says,

I love being driven along this road.

I say,

I hate it - it's my least favourite thing to do at night.

But you are still willing to do it for me, he says.

Yes, but not with very good grace, I say.

He laughs. I don't think he knows what grace is.

Luckily the Indian meal from The Ganges - the best one in Exeter - is excellent. I suggest Robin eats his Chicken Tikka in his fingers. But it's painful to watch him trying to get the pieces into his mouth with his increasingly droopy left hand, the dipping sauce drips from the naan bread onto his jumper. It takes a long time  - he seems to be exhausted afterwards.

The Occupational Therapists came to visit today - they were lovely and helpful and full of suggestions about  drinking cups and button fasteners and soap on a rope and support cushions under the elbow. One of them comes and sits next to me on the sofa when I start crying (usually it's people's kindness that starts me). She says,

 Don't feel you are on your own. You can ring us anytime.

Something else to add to the 'doing it all on your own' list.