Short and Inconclusive

Lyme Regis on Sunday,

the waves crashing 

over the Cobb wall.

So we didn't venture far along 

the top of the wall....

remembering the last time we were here 

Robin tripped on the steps leading up to the wall and fell on his bad hand, hurting his fingers.

So instead of walking to the very end like we usually do he bought an ice cream cone, which he had great difficultly lifting to his mouth, letting it dangle at an alarming angle, dripping from his hand. We wandered back along the beach, heading into the wind.

The letter we've been waiting for arrived this afternoon along with more Christmas cards. The letter from the neurologist with the MRI results. It's short and inconclusive. He says the scan shows " relatively rapid temporal frontal and hippocampal atrophy.....and nerve conduction studies show a motor axonal demyelinating pattern......which doesn't point us in the direction of MNT specifically....."

I translate that as it's getting worse but he doesn't know what it is.

 I ring the GP and she advises me to push for an early appointment in January.

So  no diagnosis then ....we are still in the dark....still waiting.

Tonight I burn the butter for the scrambled eggs. Then I burn the toast and throw it away.  I forget about the Christmas cake in the oven while I watch the semi-finals of Professional Masterchef and it burns on the top so I expect it'll be dry.

I've never felt less Christmassy and more behind in all my preparations.....