Wednesday 1 August 2012

Ancestor Echo


1st August 2012 Wednesday
The lovely CAB advisor is sitting in the big chair in our front room. She has her laptop on the table and is reading out the  submission letter she has written for the Tribunal on behalf of my husband.

She says  ‘It’s short because we want to get to the crux of the matter’.

My husband looks blank. I explain crux.
The crux of the matter for me is that also in the room are my sister and a dear friend who has stepped up to be there on the day of the Tribunal to offer moral support. It feels like I have a whole Team GB on my side - working for us, helping us, reminding me of the context of this whole thing  - that how I am being is much more important than what I am doing.
So trusting and being unafraid and light will make much more difference than getting all the words right in the letter.
I also realise that what I do trust are my genes. I come from an amazing family of strong and bold pioneers and survivors and difference-makers. So whenever I doubt my ability to come through this particular time in my life, if I listen hard enough, I can hear the persistant echo of my ancestors thrumming in my bones.
 If they could do it then, I can do it now.

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